Speaking of me

I was reading over my old posts, and it was a little disturbing. At the time I write these things, I feel like I am truthfully representing myself. However, when I read them over after a lot of time has past, I feel like they don't really speak for me. In person it would be a whole other story. If these posts were being presented in the person I think it would be easier to get it/understand me (why would I want that). But that would be weird because I'd be standing around verbally posting and people would wonder what was wrong with me. Posting is totally not what a real conversation is like. It would be pretty funny though to have the posts written on thought bubbles and every once in a while I could just hold one up over my head.
Anyway, my point is that I come off better in person I think. At least it's easier to get the jokes... I think. Maybe I'm wrong.
Do I really talk like this? I don't know. I've only starting wondering about that now. I'll have to think about it. So much of what I say just goes out of mouth and then I am done with it. Like when people say, 'hey remember when you said this?' And I really don't. I just say, 'nope, I don't remember that. Are you sure I said it?' Usually they are pretty sure, so I have to believe them. A lot of the time the things I say are a total surprise to me. Like I really don't remember having that thinking process. I have boxes of old journals and sometimes when I read them I can't remember thinking about the stuff I wrote about. It's in my writing, but has completely left my mind. I guess it's either self-preservation or I just have a really shitty memory.
That's why I'm writing down everything about my pregnancy and birth, so that when she asks me about it I can just say, here read this!
Maybe I'll write in in thought bubbles and hold them up over my head for her so she can feel like she is part of the process... which she was, duh!